My hair looks good today, I polished away the flu with a little blush, and I’m wearing that LBD that makes every day a good day. Even though it’s Monday – or maybe it especially brightens up a Monday. I want to sit down in a bar, with a way to densely written 19th century novel, order a small glass of wine (or two), and be a model citizen by helping an old lady carry her suitcase up the stairs when I catch the S-bahn back. I feel like the embodiment of the French “je ne sais quoi” and all I want to do is carelessly light a cigarette, whilst I’m strutting through the streets of Berlin.
The only problem is I’m not in France, and I don’t know enough of German sayings – all I know is that the grammar frustrates me. No strut, just running my eyes over foreign words that look too similar to my first language. No bars, no wine, no cigarettes, because it’s still that ever dreaded Monday and I don’t smoke.
Then again… “C’est la vie” has always been more powerful than “Je ne sais quoi.”
Over a year has passed and nothing more than a quick welcome has been scribbled down in this little corner of the Internet. (probably going to delete it) So where are we now? Since January I graduated from my masters program, took a flight to Bangkok with my bestie B. traveled through Thailand and Cambodia for six blissful weeks, broke up my almost-but-not-really three year relationship, and since three weeks I now live in Berlin. Oh how lovely this little sum-up sounds when you go over it like that: one sentence, a few commas and no details what so ever. But trust me, especially following your dreams can be a real bitch – because that’s just life. Nobody ever said it was going to be easy, but that doesn’t mean it cannot be fun. All I’m saying is that I expected Berlin to be a little more zsa zsa zsu, and a little less living with an older lady and her two cats, not having a stable internet connection, and being tackled by the worst flu I’ve had in years. It feels like living in Eat, Pray, Love, so who knows… things might look up for me soon.